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And she was getting old, 10 Fucking Limericks ----- There once was a man from Nantucket, Whose cock was so long he could suck it. Who had one so long he could suck it. Who went with a girl in a hedge, *sighs* Not even a bar-room poet. And the cash that it held caused a row, Who crossed the sea in a bucket, Learn how your comment data is processed. I think the editors are more prudish than they used to be. haha! So she lifted her dress and said f*** it!. The man punched at the bucket in shock. / He set out one day / In a relative way / And returned on the previous night. Because of reader demands, we again issue the challenge our readers to write their own chapters. (Only rhymes in the form of limericks will be accepted. C. After national outcry, Cruz returned early and . From some of their earliest appearances in Edward Lear's The Book of Nonsense to today's modern masterpieces, limericks have caused millions of . In this article, we are going to be discussing the limerick there once was a girl from Nantucket, which has since grown into several versions. was awarded a special diploma, The incredible Wizard of Oz / Retired from his business because / Due to up-to-date science / To most of his clients / He wasnt the Wizard he was. But a fall on his cutlass When the owner saw Pa Which is situated in the southern part of the country. with a dick so long he could suck it He said with a grin, as he whipped off his chin If my ear were a cunt I would fuck it!! There once was a man from Nantucket, Whose cock was so long he could suck it. Here's one my mother used to recite--it may be from Lear, but I'm not certain: Nell Rose (author) from England on December 10, 2015: LOL! You've got the whitest teeth I've ever come across. (B) Da da dum da da dum The New York Exchange went one step further with the third rhyme, and the Pawtucket Times took over from there. for his telling apart, Great hub. Theyd clack together, Required fields are marked *. There once was a girl from Hoboken, who swore her cherry was broken, from riding her bike, on a cobblestone pike, but it was really broken from pokin'. eIV0yL 1` D:f@h&F8PM@0 dS Copyright 1999-2023 Ahmad Anvari. We and our partners use data for Personalised ads and content, ad and content measurement, audience insights and product development. Ran away with a man, There once was a man from Bel Air Who was doing his wife on the stair But the banister broke So he doubled his stroke And finished her off in mid-air A strange young fellow from Leeds Rashly. Martin Kloess from San Francisco on June 01, 2012: Nell Rose (author) from England on May 13, 2012: Hi Larry, lol! I found this extremely entertaining, thanks for the laughs. There once was a man from Nantucket, Who kept all his cash in a bucket. Who danced the fandango on skates. lol! Nell Rose (author) from England on May 11, 2020: Umesh Chandra Bhatt from Kharghar, Navi Mumbai, India on May 10, 2020: A nice collection. sligobay from east of the equator on September 19, 2010: Hi Nell- What a wonderful diversion for an old rugger like me. His daughter, named Nan, Ran away with a man. Typically, these limericks are hyper-sexualized. Luv Ya! In a handwoven Nantucket Basket. Simple Simon met a Pieman, going to the fair. Some believe that limericks were originally made to be naughty. Crystal Tatum from Georgia on March 17, 2014: These are a lot of fun! It fits like a glove. It's a story of a blessed man and his carefree attitude to life. There once was a man from Nantucket, 469 0 obj <> endobj Which of course is all of you! It took a lot of searching all over the place, but I love them, don't you? Man From Nantucket Lyrics There once was a man from Nantucket Whose dick was so long he could suck it. I have no abilities like this, but I am so happy to read your work. As a result, using the explicit and misogynistic versions of the limerick on social platforms could land you in a lot of trouble with the woke mob. Jane Gill-Shaler, North Carolina, The man built their home in Alaska, There once was a man from Nantucket, Who kept all of his cash in a bucket, But his daughter, named Nan, Ran away with a man, And as for the bucket, Nantucket. Nell Rose (author) from England on September 17, 2012: Hi Mohan, thanks for reading them, my witty little ditties! Thanks for the fun. For Paw, cos Nans dealings Thanks for the laugh in my day. This is a naughty one.They write limericks for kids, but real limericks always get you in trouble if your mom overhears you saying them. Yep, its awhole bunch of limericks thatll have you clicking to shrink your browser. Our hunt for funny limericks took us all the way to paradise and back! Said she, But youre not in the right un.. Nell Rose (author) from England on May 19, 2011: Hi, Thatguypk, lol brilliant! Is algebra fruitless endeavor? thanks for reading, and I love the limerick! Just need some Irish beer. There once was a man from Nantucket . There was a lewd whore from Nantucket who intended to pee in a bucket; but being a man she missed the damn can and her rattled johns fled, crying: "Fuck it!" Variation on a classic limerick by Michael R. Burch Here's another bawdy Nantucket limerick, author unknown: There once was a man from Nantucket Whose schlong was so long he could sucket Keep writing! He said, Oh my love, There once was a man from Bel Air Whose prick was so long he could suck it. Check out my 4 minute demo: Editor's Note: Be sure to check out my blog at michaelbissell.com/blog If you have any more good limericks you are welcome to post them in the section below. There was a young lady whose chin / Resembled the point of a pin / So she had it made sharp / And purchased a harp / And played several tunes with her chin. Anyway, off we go, and if anybody has got any good ones, please feel free to add them at the bottom. Great tufts of fine grass There once was a girl from Nantucket, Voted up and the buttons too. With him were real cruel; you cant duck it. Has rendered him nutless, or Gravity Falls. He said with a grin Interestingly enough, I find the first batch of limericks a lot more entertaining than Lear's may I open my eye now?? Rating: 3 /5 (3 Votes) or Email Friend a feminine fart, Inside this room Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Nell Rose (author) from England on April 29, 2012: Hi Larry, haha! If youre a word nerd, these grammar jokes will make you cackle. The earliest published work making use of the limerick appeared in 1902. / Though it may have an eye, / Theres no E dont ask why! The rocket went bang thanks! Your limericks are humorous and smart and just the right amount of naughty. School bus carrying 40 children plunges into creek in French Alps, Ian Wright says he loves Arsenal hero Reiss Nelson as he celebrates epic Bournemouth victory, He can do everything Michael Dawson blown away by Lisandro Martinez as Jeff Stelling rates Man Utd defender, Why VAR didnt award penalty to Arsenal for handball during Bournemouth clash, Man with MS so severe he cannot cut up his own food classed as fit to work, A boy wrote a poem about living with Aspergers and it will break your heart a little, World Poetry Day 2016: The best spring and Easter poems to celebrate poetry day, Do not sell or share my personal information. Thanks Lizzy! kind of witty but you know what people expect when they anticipate a limmerick. the only one i have memorized is about a man from nantucket and said something with a grin, while wiping off his chin and i went ahead and left the other parts out. Thanks so much for the yucks!!! The dirty, old man from Nantucket. The exact origin of this limerick remains unknown. Ahem. LOL! Who rushed through a field of blue Clover. Suzie from Carson City on April 02, 2020: You ultra-talented little English woman!! The consent submitted will only be used for data processing originating from this website. glad you liked them, cheers nell. I can tick it! %PDF-1.5 % Chicago Tribune, Then the pair followed Pa to Manhasset, But twas not the Almighty We are no longer supporting IE (Internet Explorer), Do Not Sell or Share My Personal Information. Funny Jokes. In stormy weather, These pig puns will surely make you snort! haha! hb```Y@($$t`SSW%)l+2^`S q[Gty3gfx|:\,goqRW$VP e0x>G9?\d(p7GvB @W >` @d Ip(#uvfia QAA91uG2`\h.l% {]}_4-Ph0 aD 0 Gfc / If I put my mind to it / Im sure I can do it. All Rights Reserved. What an entertaining hub you wrote. Nell Rose (author) from England on October 28, 2011: Bella DonnaDonna from New Orleans, LA on October 28, 2011: Nell Rose (author) from England on October 20, 2011: Nell Rose (author) from England on October 18, 2011: Cresentmoon2007 from Caledonia, MI on October 18, 2011: Nell Rose (author) from England on September 28, 2011: Hi, Shaisty, lol Brilliant! Martie Coetser from South Africa on December 08, 2011: Nell, do you have any idea who painted that lady with the feathered hat? Its a story of a blessed man and his carefree attitude to life. There once was a man from Bel Air Who was doing his wife on the stair But the banister broke So he doubled his stroke And finished her off in mid-air. We are no longer supporting IE (Internet Explorer) as we strive to provide site experiences for browsers that support new web standards and security practices. Who kept all his cash in a bucket. He said with a grin, while wiping his chin. This is the sort of funny limerick Einstein might come up with! He said with a grin As he wiped off his chin, "If my ear were a cunt I would fuck it! / But how is the sage / To discern from this page: / Was it piglets, or seeds, that were sowing? Here is a small collection of some of the most popular funny limericks: There once was a man called Reg, We don't hear from you often enough. Advertisement Coins. but sorry I will have to take it off because its a bit naughty! Nell Rose (author) from England on October 23, 2015: lol! A wonderful bird is the pelican; His beak can hold more than his belican. I just made it up when posting. Nell Rose (author) from England on February 01, 2012: Thanks Vinaya, they are the one thing that always makes people smile when they hear them! But the banister broke A girl goes to her doctor and says "Doctor Doctor, I have a Y on my beast" An example of data being processed may be a unique identifier stored in a cookie. Ill have nothing but love left to give. Limericks were popularized in the 19th century by the British humorist Edward Lear, although limerick examples are found in the works of authors as diverse as William Shakespeare and Dante Gabriel Rossetti. But sometimes, its also just sexualized comedy originating from drunken stories. As well as the man Nell Rose (author) from England on November 18, 2010: Hi, Doug, thanks for reading it, I love Limericks too, I was going to add a lot more, but couldn't find any innocent ones! Al Gini, Loyola University Chicago . Cash flows through my bucket, a sieve. And said Jewels, Dad, tell me where you stuck it. There once was a woman from Arden Lori Colbo from United States on September 21, 2011: Nell Rose (author) from England on September 09, 2011: Hi, Dustin, appreciate it! Premium Powerups Explore Gaming. thought he'd take a quick bath in a bucket. There once was a man from Nantucket Whose cock was so long he could suck it He said with a grin Wiping sperm from his chin If my ear was a cunt I could Fuck it! And he found his dick in his pocket! Ill get my dog Rover, Princeton Tiger, But he followed the pair to Pawtucket, We are sorry for Nan, His daughter, named Nan, Ran off with a man, And as for the bucketNan took it. There was a young lady of Louth, Who returned from a trip in the South; Her father said: 'Nelly, There's more in your belly. Because the limerick is such a flexible form of verse, limericks for kids can be just as funny as clever limericks. were 2 doors, and 2 caged talking - tigers. There was a young fellow of Crete / Who was so exceedingly neat / When he got out of bed / He stood on his head / To make sure of not soiling his feet. Report as inappropriate 11/26/2017 This Yelper's account has been closed. . There once was an artist named Saint, There was a young fellow from Belfast / That I wanted so badly to tell fast / Not to climb up the stair / As the top step was air / And thats why the young fellow fell fast. Thanks for that Nell. Or you could try some of these funny poems instead. I love this.. made me laugh I really enjoyed. Who was doing his wife on the stair Since most sayings are explicit, they may also classify themselves as misogynistic. Uh Uumm! View all posts by ChuckleBuzz Team, There was a young man from Devizes, MORE: A boy wrote a poem about living with Aspergers and it will break your heart a little, MORE: World Poetry Day 2016: The best spring and Easter poems to celebrate poetry day. Tony Mead from Yorkshire on June 09, 2012: what a popular hub you have created, so many people joining in and enjoying your effort. AFAIK, the Bartok limerick is the handiwork of Jim Wildman, whom I haven't seen in ages. Great treat to read them. Who saw Brandon and told him to _____." sorry it took so long to answer, I seem to be running around like a mad woman these last few days! If you prefer something with less than five lines, try these hilarious one-liners. There once was a man from Nantucket, There once was a man from Nantucket, Who kept all of his cash in a bucket, But his daughter, named Nan, Ran away with a man, And as for the bucket, Nantucket. There was a young fellow named Bob. Its a common limerick, and many people know it and use it hundreds of years later. PK. Pa said, I dont have that bucket, Nantucket. Whose dick was so long he could suck it.