Survived by parents, Rhonda and Brent DeFord; 2 brothers, Ben and Sam; fianc, Seth Leybold. She lives inside me always. He's not that forthcoming.". At the same time she was such a courageous little girl that your heart swells with the love of her. TimesMachine is an exclusive benefit for home delivery and digital subscribers. It was a nice tribute to him. And please, dear God, find a cure for my disease.' It was a time when a new family had moved into the Westport, Conn., neighborhood. This is one of the first books I can remember checking out myself and reading, and I don't know what would have possessed a 12 year old to read a book like this, but it definitely changed me and stayed with me all these years. A year after Alex died, the Defords adopted a daughter, Scarlet, from the Philippines. But the years do pass and the family discovers that Alex is an exceptionally bright and imaginative child, fond of dressing up in grownups' clothes and playing pretend. And I always forgot the damn flashbulbs. ADDITIONAL SERVICES, Tuesday, 11am, Gospel Assembly Church, 9600 E. 47th St., April 20, 1986 Alexandra Deford was 9 years old when she went home from the hospital for the last time, in January of 1980. Or sometimes I think, what would Alex want me to do here? Cyd stopped and paused. WebMiss Alexandra M. Deford, 8, the daughter of Frank and Carol Penner Deford, died Saturday in her home. What a loss.. Andrew Brandt (@AndrewBrandt) May 29, 2017. I think it's important to try and learn about those who are different from us in any way and try to see waht their life is like. CF has the potential to be the first disease to be cured, and they're on the verge of that now. There was nothing rational in thatI'm not even physically littlebut sometimes I thought it was really quite apt, that I was more her little thing than she mine. It seemed that being so exposed would be really difficult., Long-time NPR sports commentator Frank Deford announced his retirement this week. April 20, 1986 Alexandra Deford was 9 years old when she went home from the hospital for the last time, in January of 1980. I say, I'm sorry I did that, Alex. Born March 5, 1952, in Bedford, Mr. DeFord was the son of Max and Betty Alice Wright DeFord. He knew how much she could take. Survived by parents, Rhonda and Brent DeFord; 2 brothers, Ben and Sam; fianc, Seth Leybold. DeFord, Alexandra R., Mar 2, 1991 June 25, 2010. Meanwhile, Alex becomes the very special presence in all their lives. You can't say that about very many books. . 1-855-211-7837. "We picked a day in which it was a relatively unemotional scene -- we weren't about to go up there for the death scene." I highly recommend this book. She's an example to me. There have been many advances in treatment since Alex died gasping in her father's arms, trying to the last to reassure and comfort him. And at the same time no one should read it. One person can change how we live. Believe me, this is not just some sad and biased father talking. You have chosen this person to be their own family member. She didn't go to the hospital until she was about 5. She's going to die. View Center. Oops, we were unable to send the email. Suddenly, Alex bolted up again. Alexandra Deford, a precious and precocious girl, was just eight years old when she died in 1980 following a battle against the debilitating effects of cystic fibrosis, the number-one genetic killer of children. ", Only once did Alex's circle of understanding break. Our support in your time of need does not end after the funeral services. Check Background. [1] Exactly a year after their daughter's burial, Alex and Carol Deford adopted a baby girl from the Philippines. I heard from a woman who became a pediatric nurse after reading the book. The implications were clear. . I find myself reading a lot of book about diseases, mental illnesses, etc. There is a problem with your email/password. I'm actually surprised to see that so many people read this book as a pre-teen at least I know that I'm not the only masochistic weirdo! To Cyd, alone, the night before, in her room, Alex said, "Good-bye forever," and then, to a new nurse, one she liked but hadn't grown that close to, Alex was almost matter of fact. But our Chris is a Christian, and going from the "Chris" to the "-tian" requires the bridge of an sh sound, so that spelled phonetically, it is more properly Chrishtian, and therefore, in the diminutive, it really should be Chrish. The book depicted Alex's discomfort with her frequent visits to the hospital as a cause of often feeling lonesome and missing social activities. Share this memorial using social media sites or email. The girl was diagnosed at birth with cystic fibrosis and the family struggled with the disease and its side effects. Please enter your email address and we will send you an email with a reset password code. Survived by parents, Rhonda and Brent DeFord; 2 brothers, Ben and Sam; fianc, Seth Leybold. Failed to report flower. I would recommend this book to anybody & everybody. Burial will be at Hillcrest Cemetery in North Vernon. Alexandra Deford is the daughter of the sports writer Frank Deford and she died in 1980 at just eight-years-old. Funeral Home website by. After Alexs death, Carol received her masters in social work. 1-855-211-7837. A physician friend "arranged for us to have dinner with two other couples who had had children . This is a carousel with slides. The memory of her father's account of her life is very vivid, years later. For example, Jake Weinstock wrote: "One time in school last year, Stephen Baker made Alex laugh so hard that she fell in my arms and then she laughed even harder. Birthplace: Danbury, Fairfield County, Connecticut, United States. His 1982 book about the family ordeal has now been adapted, with Mr. Deford's retaining script-approval rights, by Nigel and Carol Evan McKeand, the producer-writers of the series ''Family.'' View Full Report Card. I read it many times, and it never lost its impact. But the second child and only little girl was never well, not for a day was she ever healthy. The doctor informed me that CF patients could expect to live until 20. Are you sure that you want to delete this photo? She sleeps in Alex's bed. Alex, the main character, has cyctic fibrosis. It becomes a really significant portion of your life.". Alex (Gennie James) is already dead when the film begins. "She would have done it. I see them constantly. She was a student at Greens Farms Elementary School. Add to your scrapbook. All Rights Reserved. She is now 25 and an art director for Scholastic Magazines. What did I think, the psychologist asked me. She said, "I love you, Chris," when her brother came into her room to say good-bye to her. Becoming a Find a Grave member is fast, easy and FREE. "The idea that tragedy brings a family together -- my own experience is that that's garbage, probably all the moreso because it's a child. He and his wife Carol didn't talk about it. Residents of Fawn Creek Township tend to be conservative. That was a good evening, sort of an observation evening." Use the links under See more to quickly search for other people with the same last name in the same cemetery, city, county, etc. Alex is forever 8, and now they are 11, then 12, soon 13 . "That's absolutely beautiful, Alex. What is it?". March 2, 1991 - June 25, 2010 Alexandra R. Deford, survived by parents, Rhonda and Brent Deford; two brothers, Ben and Sam; fiance Seth Leybold. Deford was voted for Sportswriter of the Year six times over the course of his career, and was voted for Magazine Writer of the Year twice by theWashington Journalism Review. Frank has begun writing his book, recalling that, for the man who believed he had everything, the birth of Alex was just the icing on the cake. Jack Carroll officiating. [1] After her death in 1980 at the age of eight, her father, Frank Deford, a sportswriter, was inspired to write a memoir about Alex three years later. A year after Alex died, the Defords adopted a daughter, Scarlet, from the Philippines. Of course, there are home movies and a lot of snapshots. [1], Alexandra Deford was born on October 30, 1971, to Frank and Carol Deford. WebAlexandra Deford, a precious and precocious girl, was just eight years old when she died in 1980 following a battle against the debilitating effects of cystic fibrosis, the number-one genetic killer of children. And, at that, still just as open, they were also blank. It's hard to say how many times I read this book when I was growing up, or how many times I watched the subsequent TV movie. 2023 Dove-Sharp & Rudicel Funeral Home. Learned about cystic fibrosis which I knew next to nothing about. 0 cemeteries found in Westport, Fairfield County, Connecticut, USA. Your new password must contain one or more uppercase and lowercase letters, and one or more numbers or special characters. See the article in its original context from. But when it is a child who dieswhen it is your childas the grief fades naturally, there still remains that vacuum, and it is replaced by anger. DeFord, Alexandra R., Mar 2, 1991 June 25, 2010. Frank Deford wrote very honestly about his family's experience with his daughter's disease and while he expressed their anguish it somehow didn't translate into anything more than a clear-eyed chronicle of Alex's life. As a subscriber, you have 10 gift articles to give each month. There is not that much that a child leaves, and Alex lived such a short time: small parts of 1971 and 1980, and all of 1972 through 1979, inclusive. She said, "Oh, Daddy, wouldn't this have been great?" Alex started calling her brother that when she was about four years old. ", And I agreed that was a fine idea. . Fawn Creek Township is located in Kansas with a population of 1,618. The story of her life is mostly written in chronological order with certain recollections from her final years weaved in between. Previously sponsored memorials or famous memorials will not have this option. Also, one whole interview I later erased by mistake. So many poignant moments and just regular living in eight short years. His daughter, Alexandra, passed away as a child in 1980. Mostly they were more interested in hearing themselves played back than in anything they might say. This is one of the most influential, meaningful books I read as a young girl. And of Alex's incredible personality and strength. There's a one in four chance their baby will have it, a one in four chance he'll be free and clear and two in four chances he'll be a carrier. Sorry! Im a very reserved person, very protective of my family and my feelings.. Deford began to write his tribute to his daughter and to continue speaking on behalf of the Cystic Fibrosis Foundation, on whose board he has served for more than a decade. Rarely does a week go by that I don't get a letter about that book. Powered by. Mr. McKeand is also the producer. So when you think your life is bad look at kids who have cystic fibrosis or cancer or mental illnesses. Cyd says: "I would feel selfish when I'd come to the ward and spend so much time alone with Alex. Also, the monster was stepping on a house. She was so full inside, felt things so deeply, and she really came to affect my life. She would call up her friends . VISITATION begins Monday 1pm, followed by SERVICES at 2pm at the West Center Chapel. Year should not be greater than current year. You are only allowed to leave one flower per day for any given memorial. There is 1 volunteer for this cemetery. Born March 5, 1952, in Bedford, Mr. DeFord was the son of Max and Betty Alice Wright DeFord. This book is for when you need a good cry. Alex needed inhalation treatments of about 15 minutes and then therapy for 40 minutes more, both morning and night, to bring up the mucous that collected in her lungs. Imagine yourself trying to live up to an eight-year-old child. The weekend that Alex came home for her last visit, Deford decided he had better be frank in telling Christian, who was just a year older. You know, I never talked to Alex about God or anything religious, but she was the most spiritual person I ever met. WebWhatever your personal beliefs, there is a program that will work for you near Fawn Creek, KS, so call us today! It left an indelible impression on my life. It is not an objective book, not objective at all. Upon re-reading this now as an adult, it's easy to see why Alex's story made such an impression. "It illustrates what Alex was going through. Frank made sure that Christian would have a small part in the movie about Alexs life. True legend in sports journalism. But Alexandra Deford happened to have a father who was a top magazine sportswriter, and the book he has written about her is a song for all the children who die, for all the families who mourn them. "No, that's not quite right. Occasionally the digitization process introduces transcription errors or other problems; we are continuing to work to improve these archived versions. As Frank notes, ''When a child has cystic fibrosis, she doesn't simply live, she has to be kept alive.'' Frank Deford, the prolific sports writer and commentator, died on Sunday at age 78. That was nice because it showed us people like ourselves who despite having had CF kids were coping -- that was important. WebThe City of Fawn Creek is located in the State of Kansas. It is to be hoped that these understandably disgruntled folk will reconsider, at least for a couple of hours, and give a chance to ''Alex: The Life of a Child'' on ABC this evening at 9 o'clock. A new introduction contains information on the latest cystic fibrosis research, and a touching postcript reveals how the Deford family came to terms with the loss of Alex. I remembered all the hardships of Alex and her family, and her heartbreaking death at the age of eight. I think everyone should read it. "That's a car." And young Miss James is quite extraordinary as the doomed girl, touchingly reflecting the words of Frank Deford: ''The older she got, the dimmer her prospects, the finer and stronger she became.'' When Alex and Carol Deford (Gennie James and Bonnie Bedelia) are coming down an escalator at a shopping mall, that's Chris standing just behind them. Alex sensed that she was going to die long before she truly understood it, and that made her special. One out of 20 Caucasians carry it -- equivalent to the population of Illinois," he said. "She went through a period in the beginning when she almost died, then she stabilized. It was how they survived, he says. Alex's disease wasn't diagnosed until she was four months old, but her father said, "She was sick almost from the day she was born -- she should have been diagnosed when she was born. They'll continue till Scarlet is 8, I suppose.". WebOther Elizabeth Deford's; Court Records Found! Required fields are marked *, Heafey-Hoffmann-Dworak-Cutler Mortuaries 2020 All Rights Reserved Terms of Use and Privacy Policy. It has to be pounded out, the way a baby is burped, only in this case the pounding goes on for half an hour every morning, so the horrendous, strangling coughs won't come so often during that day. Then it weakened her heart, affected her liver, gave her arthritis, spatulated her fingertips so that she would try to hide her hands from strangers. And wondering at the magnificent spirits that sometimes come and inhabit the bodies of the ones we do know and really love. haha! [6] Frank would eventually dedicate the book to Scarlet so that she would grow up to know who Alexandra Deford was. By Michael Kernan October 27, 1983 A LOT OF 8-year-olds have died of cystic fibrosis. She was sick almost from the day she was born, Frank told the Washington Post in 1986. Alex was eight years old when she died of cystic fibrosis on January 19, 1980, seven months after Erin was born. Eventually the filmmakers got a little girl who has CF to go to a studio and cough, said Deford. Frank Deford was raised in Baltimore, Maryland, and was the oldest of three boys. . Why, some stranger coming across Alex's stuff would think she must have spent most of her life drawing. based on information from your browser. Tulsa, OK, 74106 60.45 miles from the center of Fawn Creek, KS. Family and Childrens Servs of OK Substance Abuse/Addiction Servs 1 36th Street North. The victim in this film is Alexandra Miller Deford, who was born Oct. 30, 1971, and died Jan. 19, 1980. Though the movie received positive reviews, Carol told Peoplethe idea of publicizing such a personal part of their life made her anxious at first. The first enemy is the mucus, which comes out of the lungs every day by the cupful. Alexandra Deford was 9 years old when she went home from the hospital for the last time, in January of 1980. Fawn Creek Township is in Montgomery County. Are you sure that you want to report this flower to administrators as offensive or abusive? They had heard that there was a little girl with a strange disease and that she had "club fingernails." Reading Alex changed my whole outlook on life. Burial will be at Hillcrest Cemetery in North Vernon. or don't show this againI am good at figuring things out. Upon her birth no alarms were raised and the Deford's believed they were bringing home a healthy baby. A LOT OF 8-year-olds have died of cystic fibrosis. Translation on Find a Grave is an ongoing project. Carol Deford went on to get her master's in social work. Their scorching, sensual affair ended in, It's parenthood, Dr. Slump style, as the Norimaki household welcomes its newest member, Turbo! ", Cystic fibrosis is "the largest fatal genetic disease in the world. The Fawn Creek time zone is Central Daylight Time which is 6 hours behind Coordinated Universal Time (UTC). Her dad is telling the story of her eight years of her life. She was right. Try again later. She had cystic fibrosis. 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